IMPORTANT NOTE PLEASE OPEN AND READ THIS
(started in September 2020)
The episodes sometimes may contain my own personal experience through depression, anxiety issues that I go through, chronic constipation,
eating disorder, mental breakdowns, some personal confessions and other
things that I experienced throughout the time of documenting this…. I have shared the solutions to the things(things that I found helpful)
I have gone through too so it may help the ones who are going through
it…if you feel uncomfortable or triggered reading any part just skip it… you may not wanna read or hear something coz you may not be going through
it but maybe someone else need these things…at least they’ll know they’re
not alone and if anyone shared something in the
comments please don’t make fun of anyone’s situation if you can’t help or comfort then don’t waste your energy in typing
too just to make fun…I wanna create a secure and healthy environment here where people are here
to help each other.... and be there for each other to support and comfort
whenever needed...THANK YOU
P.S. ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE AND SO THIS MAY HAVE GRAMMATICAL ERRORS… BUT PLEASE UNDERTAND AND BEAR WITH ME…LOL🤡🙏
ANOTHER P.S. NOTHING IS SPONSERED IN THIS BLOG EVERYTHING IS BASED ON MY GENUINE EXPERIENCES
3 am thoughts
Jo Kuch muje Chahiye wo sabke pass hai...Jo Kuch muje krna hai... wo to dusre aur bhi bahut log kar rahe hai...I know my ideas will work... But when will I start working on them? Agar abhi kuch nhi kiya to…someone else will replace me and do what I want to do and get what I want…I need to start right now…
Jo chiz aaj mai soch rahihu wo yeh hai ki…
KAB CHALU KAROGE?
Jab tumhe
pata hai you want it and you know
how to make it work when will you start? Kis BAAT Ka wait kar rahi ho? Procrastination will only bring me regret and nothing else... I have to start… at least muje pata to chalega k how far I can go and
how long I can push myself... My brain knows I want it...but then why am I
not working? Kaha se shuru karu is just an excuse ... start it today... if
you wanna paint something… take the brush in your hand at least…
You must be thinking prologue to kabka banaya hai...I would've started doing something... Nope …I did follow the routine...for like 3 days...but then exams shuru ho gaye...par aisa nhi k mai routine follow nhi kar sakti thi... I could have... This is my biggest problem...I don't start easily...and when I do... I don't know why I leave after 2-3 days...and even if I stick to something…I give up when I’m close to achieve it… and then REGRET….
But this time I
had a strong determination against myself…coz I know It won't work like that…secondly I didn’t want to regret again...but still I am making excuses... And I'm feeling too much pathetic right
now...
why did I left doing it?
Am I ok with who I'm right now? Is it enough for me? Do I really want to be like the one I'm right now? Why do I leave things which I know are good for me? Would make me better?
What the fck am I doing with my life?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
But the
thing is...EVEN IF I'VE FELL DOWN BY TANGLING MY LEGS BY MYSELF... MAI RUKUNGI NAHI... I'LL START AGAIN.... Mai jo kal thi... Maybe she gave up due to her lack of
determination...or maybe KAL WALI MAI KO FARK NAHI PADTA THA MERE FUTURE K BAARE ME KI MAI KAHA
TAK JAUNGI...
But today's me...SHE DOES...
She doesn’t want to be the person she is right now FOREVER...With the hope that I won't fall again... Mai fir start karungi...I forgive the one I was yesterday... I'll start again tomorrow as someone new... AS THE ONE WHO REALLY WANT SOMETHING... As someone who want to get a better life ..khudke liye... Muje pata hai this journey to change my life will be hard coz changes ki adat apne man ko adapt karne me time lagta hai and its not as fast and easily as we think...and I think this maybe the first time I've fell in this journey...and I may fall again...muje pata hai...but then I've made up my mind... I'll forgive and start again...
I FORGIVE MYSELF FROM YESTERDAY AND I WILL TRY AGAIN FOR A BETTER ME FOR
TOMORROW...
LET'S GET STARTED....AGAIN...
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LETTER TO MY FUTURE SELF …
Dear Ski(Meri happy circus ki CEO),
I know times will get hard and your laziness will try to overcome your
determination and you will start making excuses and avoid working on what
you want… but PLEASE DON’T STOP…PLEASE DON’T LET THAT COVER YOU... PLEASE
DON’T LET ME DOWN…
I know you can do it…. You want so many things so badly, don’t you? And I
know you can push yourself to some shit extent to get them… I know your true
potential honey… just DON’T LET EXCUSES COME OVER YOUR DREAMS… coz I
know…you can do it… PLEASE DON’T GIVE UP…Stick to it… no matter how low you
feel… no matter how disappointed or unworthy your brain makes you think of
yourself…no matter how many times people tell you what the results would be
according to them… DON’T MAKE THEIR THOUGHTS MANIPULATE
YOUR GOALS… COZ YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS THE WHOLE PLAN AND THEY
DON’T…so just get up… dress up and work for it…you love to dress up and
start working don’t you dear? And you look good too… when you put up your
favourite make up and smile (I know there’s not much you can do while doing
your make up lol but still)… I swear I feel you can ACHIEVE ANYTHING…and
make ANYTHING WORK…and mark my words sweetie… YOU WILL MAKE IT… I know it
coz you are MORE WISER than I am…MORE STRONGER than I am…and you have MORE
POTENTIAL than I have…please don’t let me down this time…aur jab kabhi bhi
low feel ho…just lie down and close your eyes and know that I’m always with
you… I’ll always be here to give you a warm hug so that you can start gain…
imagine you talking to me… ranting all the shit you have inside…and
when you feel better open your eyes again and start working again…I believe
in you… and I know you will make it…just keep going<3<3
love you a lot my bubbly pie clownie buddy…<3<3
KEEP GOING COZ YOU ARE ALWAYS AMAZING<3<3
Yours lovingly,
Ski(Past wali clown)
-----End of episode-----
Comments me batao muje how you are feeling or about anything you wanna share with me…you can dm me on instagram too…I will try to answer everyone before I go to sleep every day… coz by being there for each other may solve many problems…we can solve it together💜✨
You are precious✨...you are strong…✨💜BORAHAE…💜✨
P.S.DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE TO MY BLOG TO GET
EMAIL UPDATES WHENEVER I POST ANYTHING NEW(I’LL POST EVERY SATURDAY PROBABLY)…
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DOWN SOMETHING…I”ll get a bit motivted…
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